


To sir, with love

by sammalfoy



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Ron Weasley Bashing, Slow Burn, Teacher-Student Relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-02
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-13 23:14:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 16
Words: 7,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29161728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sammalfoy/pseuds/sammalfoy
Summary: Hermione Granger needs help for Wolfsbane preparetion, so she send a letter to Professor Snape, that's is recovering from Nagini's bite in St. Mungus.Not knowing why she needs Wolfsbane, professor Snape tries to figure out. In this mean time, he need to deal with those stranger feelings he is having about the brightest witch of the century.
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Severus Snape
Comments: 9
Kudos: 55





	1. MAY 25, 1998

MAY 25, 1998  
Professor Snape or Severus?  
First I would like to know how your recovery is at St. Mungus and I apologize for asking if I can call you by your first name.  
But I didn't know how to proceed with my letter without looking ridiculous and given the circumstances of the war, I think we are free to be Hermione and Severus, right? I hope so. If you want a friend, you can find this on me. I don't want anything in return for saving your life, if it's this is you wondering why I am writing to you.  
I hope you are resting and doing well. You don't have to worry about the trial because Harry and I take care of everything.  
I hope you would return my question as a friend not as something you need to pay me back.  
I wanted to ask you about the properties of the Wolfsbane potion, which is why I write. (besides wanting to know how you are). Do not need to be right now if you aren't feeling alright.  
As I said, when you feel better I will wait for your owl. I'm at Hogwarts to finish seventh grade. And if you want news outside of St. Mungus, I can give it to you. Harry and Ginny are getting married and there's a big thing about this because the party will be at Hogwarts in the end of semester.  
The last of Death Eather's are getting arrested by the Auror's and you don't have to worry anymore about Voldemort. I think you can find a time to rest now, you are the breavest man I knew. I want you to know that. 

To Sir, with love.  
Hermione Granger.


	2. MAY 26, 1998

MAY 26, 1998  
Miss Granger, or should I say, Ms. Weasley?  
I heard a lot of rumors about it while I was here. The mediwzards do not know how to be quiet when it comes to the lives of others.  
They gossip a lot and I listen everything they said while they thinking I am sleeping. I am not surprised that you sent me an owl to ask only about Wolfsbane's properties. Is it for a special project like release the House Elfes? And yes, everyone at Hogwarts is aware of your attempt to free the house elves, includding all professor's. I promise I never laughed about this.  
Before you think that I am totally heartless, I would like to thank you. I know very well that it was you who got me out of the The Shrieking Shack. Potter is as delicate as a horse that would have made me bleed more than I was already bleeding and Weasley saving me would be the same thing as all the owls in the wizarding world would stop sending letters. Impossible thing.  
You always had a weakness for lost causes anyway. There is a moment in my recovery that I think I might be one of yours causes. I don’t need to tell you that I haven't been surprised when they tell me who saved me.  
Whatever you need to know about Wolfsbane, I'll pass it on to you. All you need to do is ask and I will give you a answer. I hope you enjoy that, it's not my normal. I am not used to be good with Gryffindor’s.  
Knowledge is nothing if we don't move it forward.  
P.S: It is absurd for you to call me Severus without asking me, Hermione.  
I hope this letter finds you well.  
Severus Snape.


	3. MAY 28, 1998

Severus,  
I'm glad we're not in trouble to greet each other.  
Anyway, in relation to my name, just Granger.  
Ron and I broke up a month ago. He was dying to get married and have a house full of children, especially now that we are not under constant threat and we are old enough for get married. I think is absurd. I need a career first, not a house full of children. One kid is something to think latter, but a ocean of kids for right now? No, thanks. I let this for Harry and Ginny. I refused all his attempts until he gave up. He even tried to tamper with my contraceptive potion. I realized and broke up with him. Anyway, I'm not sending letters to let you know about my failed relationship with Ron Weasley.  
Besides, something happened. I am not the same girl who I am used to be and how far I can see, you are not the same man too. Or I have a idea that maybe this it's just you without the war stress. I remember that while I as your student I was dying for some compliment but I don't think that's matter anymore. I am happy that we could share letters like mature people do because I have so much to ask to you. I don't know you know, but I really like potions.  
Again, I don't want you to talk to me for payment. Your life it's not something you have to pay me. You will have to forgive Harry, but I now I know about Lily, sir.  
You don't scare me anymore, this is why I have the courage to write to you in first place. I was thinking in a visit, but maybe writing was better to get a conversation with you. We had to know about Lily to set you free from going to Azkaban. I promise that your secret it's safe with us and Ministry. Harry never would say a word to ruin your privacy.  
I've been preparing Wolfsbane as instructed, but something seems wrong. When ingested, there is a burning in the throat that shouldn’t exist. I have tried to prepare the potion correctly, but have failed miserably, even following all the instructions in the book. I don’t know why this keep happing. Can you help me?  
And I realize something that maybe could scare you.  
It's easy write to you, I could write more than that if you would be glad in reading my words.  
I await your owl,  
To Sir, with love. Hermione Granger.  



	4. JUNE 1, 1998

Hermione,  
I can't imagine why you need Wolfsbane, but it's none of my business, however curious I may be. Is it Lavender Brown? I heard that she was bitten by Greyback but I don't know if she survive.  
I knew Greyback enough to feel disgusted about his actions. He was Lord Voldemort's favorite. He and Bellatrix.  
I can prepare lots of Wolfsbane when I leave St. Mungus or I can teach you properly. I never knew that you would want compliments from me. But shouldn't be a surprise to you to be the best in my class. I never could give points to Gryffindor, especially Potter's friend. You imagine what my Slytherin's would say to they parents if they saw me praising you? Your essays have always been very good. Above average. I imagine that Potter and Weasley never wrote a word right on they essay if wasn't for you.  
Each day here is more unbearable than the next and healers gossip more than first-year students at Hogwarts.  
Well, it's not about my time at St. Mungus that you should be wondering, so I'll get to the point: use the standard cauldron number 3 and not the standard number 5 you used in my classes. The vial will be smaller and the burning in the throat must pass. If the throat is bad, I send a note on the back of this letter with another potion that can help heal wounds. And again, I am trying not to guess why you need Wolfsbane.  
The flask will be smaller if prepared in cauldron number 3 and therefore, the measurements of the ingredients too, but the burning will pass.  
Any problem you know where to find me.  
They said that I have more days but hopefully I can see the Hogwarts Selection in September. You said that you are at Hogwarts, but doing what? I don't remember to hear about the class organization and about what happens with last year’s students. The only person that I talk these months from Hogwarts was McGonagall. She was stupefied about how I did what I did. To be honest, I still don't know how I survived. I was waiting for death and you came.  
I don't blame they (or Minerva) for hate me while I was Headmaster, therefore. I know they do. You can write more if you want. There’s nothing to do here anyway. It's easier write to you too. I think would be worse if you came to a visit.  
Again, thank you for keeping Lily was a secret. Nothing to be ashamed of, but you know I am a private man. I don't believe that I am writing this but... if Potter want, there’s a photography album on my desk in my potions laboratory at Hogwarts. I don't trust him to take this without seeing the place around, so if you want to take for him, you can. Minerva will lead you to my office.  
Severus Snape


	5. JUNE 3, 1998

JUNE 3, 1998  
Hermione,  
Since you didn't write me back, I think my suggestion for the brew works.  
I don't know why I am writing and worrying, but I see problems in paradise. Potter's visited me and when I ask about you, he said that you, him and Weasley fight. Why? Potter was strange and he was avoiding me more than would be normal and this don’t make sense. If he don’t want to see me, why he came to St. Mungus for the first place?  
Seriously, what is happing? Why you need wolfsbane? I don’t like to gossip, so I didn’t ask Potter about this. It's not of my business, but you saved my life, and this give me a card to get worry with you.  
Please, return my letter. I just need to know if you’re fine.

Severus Snape


	6. JUNE 5, 1998

JUNE 5, 1998  
Hermione, we had nights of full moon and I am worry as hell. Where you are? Can you please return my letters?


	7. JUNE 6, 1998

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we will have more longs chapters, i just need introduce the story first.

JUNE 6, 1998  
Right. I shouldn't be getting into it, but I asked Minerva and she said you aren’t at Hogwarts.  
You went to help rebuild the Castle and then you disappeared. Girl, where are you? I am an old man who cannot die from worry. I saw two wizarding wars. I don’t need to be worried like this anymore. I don’t know if you know, but stress isn’t good for my recovery. The med wizards was seeing my stress and they will cut off my privilege from writing if this keep me under stress. And I swear for Merlin, if you disappear like this while you're my student, Gryffindor now would have less than 300 points! WHERE ARE YOU? 

Do you send me letters about Wolfsbane and then disappear on a full moon? Where the hell are you?  
Don't save me to kill me now, please.

My owl isn't finding you, I hope this letter don't return again.  
Severus Snape.


	8. JUNE 7, 1998

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, I'm updating another chapter and I would like to thank those who noticed an error in the dates of the letters. I have already adjusted this and here is another chapter. Remembering that English is not my first language, so I apologize already.

It was humiliating! He's never been so crazy with worry. The last time his heartbeat in anguish like that was because of Lily Potter. St. Mungus was a horrible place to be concerned and he couldn't convince others to let him go so he could go home. Not that Spinners End was a proper home, but anything was better than being treated like an invalid.

His neck hurt like hell after Nagini's bite and even the pain potions would make this get better, but his anguish about not knowing where the Granger girl was, was worse.

He didn't know where to start looking. Would kill his proud to ask Potter or Weasley, but what else he is supposed to do? He was stuck on St. Mungus and for Merlin, he can't go after Hermione while he is lying on a bed.

For his lucky, he receives a visit on afternoon.

"Seriously, Shacklebolt, I am fine." he isn’t, his voice was affected by the attack and was really hard to say some words but Severus don't died from trying to saying what he needs "The least you and Ministry can do for me it's send me home. Really, I can't deal with more war stress. I need go home."

Not that Severus was looking forward to go back to Spinner's End. Isn't. Hermione, remember? He will get his butt out of St. Mungus so he can go after the girl who was preparing wolfsbane.

"I sorry Snape, but we need to see if everyone is okay."

"Shacklebolt, for Merlin's sake...." he coughed "let me go home. I am a potion Master and I can take care of my self. This is not the first time that Voldemort nearly kill me"

" I don't doubt of your qualities to take care of yourself, Snape, but sometimes we need been taken care of. Please, stay and let the med wizards check on you"

Severus rolled his eyes. Shacklebolt was a impossible man.

"If you want..." he coughed again "...to see me arrested, send me to Azkaban! If not, let me out of here!"

Shacklebolt leaned against the bedroom wall, seeing that Severus would not give in to be taken care of.

"Okay. I'm going to see what I can do for you."

"Finally!" his voice was down, and was painful to speak, but he need to make another question for the other wizard.

"You heard about miss Granger?"

"Not a thing" Shacklebolt answered "we are trying to contact her to a job in Ministry and not success in find her. Do you know something?"

"Nothing. This why I ask."

"I see... So, i will let you rest. With lucky I will convince the med wizards let you go home by the end of next week.

Snape always hated the Ministry anyway.

After the afternoon potions put him to sleep, he took the ink and the parchment to try to write another letter, but now for a person he didn't expect to contact again anytime soon.

**JUNE 7, 1998**

_Draco, I send this letter to ask if you know about news from Miss Granger. It's weird that I'm talking to you about a former student, I know. She sent me a letter and now nobody can find her and the Golden Trio fight recently. I don't want to be paranoid about it, but given the circumstances, we still have some Death Eaters out there._

_Do you have any idea about that? I imagine it has something to do with Greyback because we were talking about werewolves and wolfsbane. I don't know how it is or how the Malfoys went after the war. Especially because I'm locked in that fucking room at St. Mungus and they're waiting for me to get better._

_As your godfather, I hope you are well and that we can review some things as Voldemort is no longer a threat. Please, send news about Lucius and Narcisa._

_Severus Snape._

He finished Draco's letter and with difficulty got another piece of parchment that was being stored on the side of his bed. Being short, he wrote new words for someone else.

**JUNE 7, 1998**

_Hermione,_

_Where are you?_

Tired of the bad day, he left the letters with his owl that was already waiting for him in the bedroom window.

He was quick to fall asleep after that and worried about the most brilliant witch of the century.


	9. JUNE 10, 1998

JUNE 10, 1998  
Severus,  
First, I want to apologize. I am at Hogwarts now. I was with Draco.  
I know you wouldn’t like a visit, but can you give a try? I don’t think I could explain myself with writing. I prefer show to you.  
To sir, with love.  
Hermione Granger


	10. JUNE 11, 1998

JUNE 11, 1998  
Granger,   
Lucky you I am out of St. Mungus. I am going to Hogwarts tomorrow and you can find me at potion class after dinner.  
I will be waiting.  
Severus Snape


	11. JUNE 12, 1998

Hogwarts was eerily empty. Severus greeted Minerva at the office he used to use last year and then familiarized himself with his way to the dungeons. To say that he was nervous was not enough. He hadn't met Granger anywhere, yet, and all he thinks about is how he's put himself in this situation. He knew that she would be in Gryffindor common room by now.  
Severus was walking around the room when it was installed in dungeons. He was worried.  
The Granger girl's behavior was totally different from what he could have predicted. What was all that mystery about Wolfsbane? He realized that he could brew any potion she asked for if she explained the reason why.  
He was scared to be right after all. With the war, Severus become realistic person and the Granger Situation was looking really bad. He had a guess about her.  
Suddenly, a light knock on the door and with a flick of his wand, he opened the door to show the figure of Hermione Granger. And she was totally different from what he remembered.  
"Severus..." Hermione was entering the room and the dungeons got hotter than usual. Despite the heat of the situation, Hermione was too much dressed in a long cloak but there’s no Gryffindor emblem there. The semester was insane, and he didn't think she would return to school soon even though she was an unbearable know-it-all. Everyone needed time to heal from Tom Riddle's damage.  
“Granger”  
“It’s Granger now?” he rolled his eyes. Of course, she would make an entrance.  
“Hermione”. Their voices were sounding softly.  
“How are you?”  
“How I am?” Severus looked at her and Hermione froze. He was angry, like he used to be when he was her teacher “you are out of your mind? You send me a blood letter about wolfsbane and disappear? Full moon? What are happing?”  
“This is why I need to show you, not write” Hermione whispered. She was next to him and Severus feel’s his breath fail.  
The two were almost leaning against the wall when Severus realized what their bodies were doing. As quickly as they approached, Hermione took two steps back.  
"I'll show you ..." Severus's throat was dry. He couldn't understand what was going on and was eager for her to explain. Or better: he didn't want to believe it.  
His pessimistic side had already understood. It was clear that he gets what was going on. He wasn’t stupid. Severus understood as quickly as the girl understood that Lupin was a werewolf in his third year.  
"Granger!" Severus' voice was almost breaking when he saw her taking off the cloak she was wearing and going with her hand to the hem of her shirt.  
"Please, wait"  
Then, she took off her shirt and turned on her back and Severus finally saw it. The damage that Greyback had done to the brightest witch of her age. Severus swallowed and felt a pain in his throat as he did so. He didn't remember the last time he had seen a half-naked witch and he tried to get his mind in the right place. At first, he felt like shit. He shouldn't even be thinking about how he felt like touching her hand on her shoulder. He didn't trust his own voice to say anything. After feeling like shit, he felt anger. Fucking Greyback, if he could see the werewolf, Severus swore that he would be able to kill him with his own hands.  
“Hermione…” he coughed. He had to sit in his chair. With a wand movement he brings a sit to her. She put her shirt back on and soon the two were sitting facing each other to talk.  
“You need wolfsbane.” Wasn’t a question. He was saying it.  
“Yes. I need, but it hurts”.  
“How bad?”  
Tears fell in her face and Severus despaired. He never deals with a girl crying. The last woman he had seen cry was Lily and because of Potter's idiot. Seeing Hermione now, she didn't look like a girl as scared and confused as she seemed to be. She had become a woman during the war and Severus cannot be blind to this.  
"A lot"  
"How it happened?" Severus wanted to beat his head on the wall, stupid, this is not a question "of course, if you didn't want to tell me, you don't need too."  
"Can I write now?"  
"You'd be more comfortable with writing about it?"  
"Definitively"  
"Right. How you feel about a good night of sleep and then you can write to me tomorrow?" He felt he had to take control of the situation by giving instructions because she seemed too distressed to do so.  
"Would you like a Dreamless Sleep Potion?"  
"Please, I would appreciate that"  
He took a bottle from his cupboard. The potion had still been there since before the war and had not spoiled. He gave the bottle to Hermione and when she left the dungeons with a sad smile on his lips, he took the potion for himself.  
He needed to sleep like hell.


	12. JUNE 13, 1998

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING:This chapter has mentions of abuse and rape. I am changing some facts from when they went to get the horcruxes at Malfoy Manor. If something gets confusing, let me know and I'll see if I need to fix it. And thank you for reading!

Severus,  
Thanks for the potion.  
I slept much better tonight than in weeks.  
Well, you didn't ask why I was with Draco making potions. I would like you to understand and not be mad at him.  
I don't know if you know, but I was captured by Bellatrix when we went to Malfoy Manor during the Horcrux hunt. It took Dobby a while to come to our rescue and we spent the night at Malfoy Manor. Greyback was there and "played" with me when Bellatrix got tired. I was hurt and raped when I left. The spell that I put on Harry's face to not be recognized took longer than we expected, and we were saved for spend night. At least, Ron and Harry were. Greyback and Bellatrix were doing things with me.  
Bellatrix didn’t want to call Voldemort until she had gotten as much information out of us as she could, but I was unable to speak at one point. She hoped that Ron and Harry could say something if they heard my screams, but it hurt so much that I stopped screaming too. Maybe if I were to be extremely quiet and silent, the pain could stop. But it didn't stop. Greyback used every part of his body that he could use to hurt me. I don't know how I lived, but I believe it was because I survived that I saved you. I could never have left you there because if Dobby hadn't come, I could have been dead. And they wanted me to be. Mudblood, Harry Potter's best friend. I was and am everything they hate.  
The day dawned and I saw the sun through the window. I was in a different room than Ron and Harry and Greyback didn't look like he was going to finish work anytime soon. Now days, I have the impression that he only left me alive because Bellatrix asked him.   
When Dobby arrived, he caught Luna first and when we saw it, we were all at Shell Cottage after a bloody battle. And then Dobby died.  
Harry asked me for help, and I couldn't speak. All he could see was that Dobby was dead and not that her best friend had been tortured. Ron was better at seeing how much I was hurt, but he didn't know how to start a decent conversation with me. He never knew even before. We continued and invaded Gringotts. I was better at some point, but I knew I would have a problem with Full Moon because Greyback had done more than I expected him to do. I left Harry and Ron for a while after Gringotts and they went to Hogwarts. I didn't know how to prepare Wolfsbane for the first transformation, so I hid in Dean's forest. When we met again, Voldemort was already at the castle. The rest you know. I saved you, Harry died and came back. Ron was Ron. The Weasley family broken because of Fred and nobody was there to save me from myself. Lupin was dead, so I had no one to talk about it.  
Malfoy was the only one who knew what had happened and it was because of him that I had a fight with Harry. They both knew very well what Greyback had done to me, they were not stupid but cowards for not being able to talk about it.  
I think I did Ron a favor when we were done because I needed to do a Glamor spell on my scars so he wouldn't see what had happened to me because he felt sick when he saw my marks.  
I feel angry all the time now. Ron was asking for children and I was near to explode. Ron never considered what has been happened to me. Seems that my emotions are bigger than it was before Greyback did his job. When I take wolfsbane, it hurts and burns. I can’t know why. Draco let me go to Malfoy Library to do my own research and Hogwarts help too, but how I can save me and save the others from me? I can’t keep doing my own Wolfsbane. I don’t have structure for that and i am going to be mad because i cant see a way out. I want to finish my studies and I know that Remus did it, but he had help. What do I have? I have scars and nightmares.  
You, of all people, seem to understand what loneliness is, Severus. I hope you won't get enough of me. I really need your help if you want give it to me.

To Sir, with love.  
Hermione Granger.  



	13. JUNE 14, 1998

JUNE 14, 1998  
Lily,  
I know you would hate me for writing to dead people, but I need to say something to you before starting a new journey. I don’t really know what I am doing here but I trying to follow my instincts. Maybe I am not too coward – how I thought I was. When I was with the Dark Lord, it was difficult to keep my feelings in order. His presence killed any emotion I could have inside me. I think that Occlumency has now become natural, because I have done so much before. You would love to study Occlumency with me, Lily, with everything I know now. Now there is a living person who could take advantage of my teachings as well.  
I protected your son as I promised. He's fine and from what I've heard, almost engaged to Ginevra Weasley. He's well enough to start a family and it looks like you don't have to worry about his welfare or whether he'll be killed by a weird dark wizard. He is happy without the war stress – so do I.   
I never stopped trying to keep Harry James Potter safe even though looking at him was a reminder that you get married with someone else. It was a short life because of me and I'm trying to deal with it when I go to sleep, especially now that I don't need to practice Occlumency twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. I always hated how Dumbledore left your son to suffer at the hands of the Dursleys. Getting him out of there wasn't an option, nor even awarding points to Gryffindor was. I did everything I could, Lily. Everything that I was in my hands to do. I had lived every day to protect your boy.  
I never forgave myself for telling Voldemort the prophecy and that weight had never left my shoulders. Only now Voldemort is dead I need to find one more thing because I am sorry to say that you aren’t enough anymore to keep me living or even enjoy life. All I have are memories of a dead woman. I hope you don’t get offended by this. You have always been an intelligent woman and I guarantee you will know what I am talking about. I can’t keep doing this for you once you’re not here. You’re dead and I finally getting what dead is. Besides, there’s another person (who’s alive) and needs me more than you need me now.   
I got to know a former student better in the past few weeks. She has a problem - almost as serious as having a child threatened with death and I want to help her. It's weird because it's not like it's a matter of honor about you and Harry. You I promised to love and I loved. With this student, it's not love. Compassion maybe and I'm anxious to see where it takes me in the same proportion that I'm terrified of, Lily.  
She is as brilliant as you were, and I think you would have been friends with her as fast as she got attached to those Weasley and Harry. She is your son's best friend and I wish you could meet her. I hope you don't mind that I'm changing my focus now.  
I don’t pretend to write to you again, because it’s with the living that I should concern about. It’s funny because I can see you rolling your eyes for what I am saying. Nothing, but the truth, isn’t?   
Truth hurts, you told me. I am looking forward to have a living person to worry about.   
Goodbye, Lily.  
I have lots of Wolfsbane to prepare.


	14. JUNE 15, 1998

JUNE 15, 1998  
Hermione,  
Sorry for taking long for return your letter.   
I know isn’t much but you have me. Don’t worry with wolfsbane. I will provide to you and we will figure out what’s going on.  
Can you meet me again in dungeons? You can come after dinner, if it’s god to you. 

Severus


	15. JUNE 16, 1998

JUNE 16, 1998  
Hermione arrived in the dungeons just after dinner. She couldn't eat much that night, even though she knew she should.   
She was anxious because she needed Wolfsbane early. The next full moon season was almost there, and she didn't want to go through it without help. Besides, they were running out of time enough to prepare for the next full moon.  
“I talked to McGonagall, she said she can give me the position of potions. I need to warn you, however.” Hermione smiled when she heard him speak. “And I took the liberty of making costumes for you. You will not miss your studies, I promise.”  
Hermione laughed, and then she felt tears wanting to run down her face.  
“What did you do?”  
“I talked to McGonagall and she said that we can arrange a space for you to use during the transformation. She was surprised that you didn't speak directly to her, more to be upset, I would say.”  
“I was afraid to talk to her ...”  
“I know, I made sure she knew about it.”  
“What will happen?” Hermione asked anxiously and Severus almost smiled.  
“She suggested Shrieking Shack ...”  
“Absolutely not!” she couldn't, not after seeing him bleed until she almost died there. A shiver ran down her spine and she felt herself shiver. Severus watched her close her eyes as she tried to calm herself. He pleaded with her so she could. A transformation caused by anger would only disrupt her plans.  
“Calm down your nerves. I cut the option off in the moment she suggested.” Snape said with a calm voice. “we will have an extra room in the dungeons, safe enough for you not to escape through the Castle. It will be close to my room and I will be able to check on you. With Wolfsbane prepared correctly, you will still have your conscience after the transformation and will be able to get through the night.”  
“And my throat burning?” She asked. He could see the fear in her eyes and this made him more confident to help her. He didn't want to stop to think about the complexity of what he was feeling because he would freak out if he did. By all means, she deserved help and if her best friends weren't capable of it, he would help.  
“We will solve that eventually. You will show me how you prepare Wolfsbane and I will see what you’re doing wrong.”   
“I will be learning from you?” she was excited, he could see from the light in her eyes. She was strangely happy. He never saw a student anxious to learn with him. He never gets a chance to feel how good teaching could be. Suddenly, he felt excited too.   
“Yes, I will prepare to you anything you need, but it’s important that you know the procedure if something happen. We will practice until you get one perfect, right?”  
She don’t like the thought about something happen to him, but she was looking for learning with him.  
“Please!”   
Then the first night making potions happened. The two found their own rhythm quickly. Severus understood that she was thirsty for following instructions - which was not a big deal if he was true to himself.   
Working with Hermione was easy. She was quieter now than she was in school, but still hungry to learn and receive whatever knowledge he could pass on to her. Severus made a mental note to offer extra Occlumency classes when the semester returned. She would be better than Potter. He just knew she would. Occlumency helped him fight some of the anger and anxiety when he needed it most, so he could help her too. Severus would do what was necessary to make the young witch's life easier.  
The sensation of having a witch depending on him filled his chest for a minute. Hermione didn't depend on anyone, he always knew that she would be an independent woman. Only at that moment, she needed someone to take care of the situation and he wanted to be her Mentor, if she allowed it. The letters that ended in “To Sir, with love” could fill his days with doubts about potions and anything else she wanted, and he would love it.   
He wouldn't take for granted that would be always like that, but he would enjoy while it lasted.   
“Severus, I have a concern.” She speaks, breaking the silence in the room.  
“Which is?”  
“We have the ingredients left over from what you prepared before me, but what about when they run out? It's too expensive.”  
“Don't worry about it. Minerva said that Hogwarts could help in some way and the Ministry of Magic cannot leave you now. Not after saving the wizarding world. We will fix this when the time comes.” He coughed “If Dumbledore a offered an unlimited supply of Wolfsbane Potion to Remus Lupin, you don’t have to worry”.   
“If he can, I can too?”  
“I never doubted you.” Severus's voice had such faith in her that for a minute, Hermione believed in herself too. If he did it, why she couldn’t?   
“One day at a time?” She asked.  
“One day at a time.” He confirmed it.  
After a few hours preparing together, they came up with a perfect potion for Hermione. The finished potion exhaled faint blue smoke.  
“Okay. Drink this. I'll separate the bottles so you can take them correctly. It tastes awful, but the burning shouldn't happen. Remus never reported this to me”  
His voice was still breaking, but he managed to keep his tone low. He himself was taking some potions to cure Nagini's bite.  
“You want to know a funny thing?”  
Hermione looked up at him, curious. She was on one side of the table and he was on the other. She never thought that Severus Snape could have something funny to say.  
“I always want to know things, Severus.”  
“I sent Dobby to the Malfoy Manor. It took me longer than expected because I had an emergency at Hogwarts that day.”  
“You who saved us?” recognition passed through her eyes.  
“I saved you and then...”  
“Then I saved you.” She realized.   
“You definitely did it.” He wanted to say that she give’s back him a reason to live too, but was much. Nor was he managing to cope with the jumble of feelings. He defined that he would be a Mentor to her, and that would be what he would do. Not that she needed to know his motivations.  
They said nothing more than good night when the night work has been completed.   



	16. JUNE 20, 1998

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IMPORTANT:  
> Guys, how are you? I discovered a fanfic with the same title, so don't be surprised if something changes in the title in the coming weeks.  
> I'm just thinking of something that fits better, because the bigger parts of the fanfic are starting to happen besides letters.  
> If anything was confused in this chapter, please let me know. I am also putting some new tags on the story as I move forward in planning the narrative.

**JUNE 20, 1998**

This past week, she had been taking the goblet full of wolfsbane that Severus had prepared for her. Before 20th, he said his concern about the doses she was preparing for herself.

“If prepared the wrong way, it could have killed you. That's why I insist that you learn to do it with me.” Severus' voice was improving during the week and he was able to speak a little more firmly. “You must have been taking a goblet full of wolfsbane every day for a week preceding the full moon, this make us late for the next one, I hope five days will be enough to get your mind under control”.

When the 20th of June finally came, came the first full moon she would spend under his care, she couldn’t be less than eager to know the outcome of the night.

“It will happen tonight?” She was stupid to ask. The body that would change was hers. It was obvious that she knew it would be that night. She was different too, getting tired easily and feeling heavy in some strange way. She was _feeling_ the beast coming to her.

“It will” Severus felt like he was the bearer of bad news and hated the feeling that came with it. Hermione failed to take the necessary doses of Wolfsbane because the time they had were less then they needed, but he hoped it was enough to keep her mind to herself.

She knew that night had come. It was late afternoon and she had already taken the potion. She was taking the wolfsbane the last few days before the full moon. She would need to drink the potion every night with a full moon. Severus told her to take it in the late afternoon, before the transformation. He wanted to change a little bit about how he had done with Remus. He wanted to see Hermione's reactions while he would try to improve the Wolfsbane.

The room was already ready for her and she would have access through a door in Severus bedroom. Minerva had guaranteed complete secrecy. The two preferred it that way. None of them had enough stomach to face Shrieking Shack's. 

“How are you feeling?” he asked carefully. He didn’t want her to see his feelings trough his words.

“Excited” he was sitting in his usual chair while Hermione was standing, watching the man in front of her.

“Any nervousness?”

“Not enough to be angry.”

“Your throat?” He was taking notes as she spoke. The two decided to keep a diary of information about each transformation and see what could be done to improve the night.

“Still hurting.”

“For Salazar” Severus coughed “I was thinking, maybe you could have some allergic reaction to any specific ingredient.”

“This could explain the burn…”

“Yes, however, I don’t want you to worry about this now. What you want to do till the right hour?”

Not only out of concern, but Severus also had no idea what ingredient could cause it. He made a mental list of Wolfsbane's ingredients and nothing strange came to mind. He would research this later.

“Can I stay and read?” 

“Definitely. You can choose a book and sit on my sofa.”

The two left the potions room for the first time to go to Severus' private room. It was comfortable, similar to a common room, and much Slytherin’s. A door to what Hermione swore to be his room and then she saw another door. “It's your room” Severus murmured “Minerva managed to make the castle transform some rooms and she knew you'd be better with me.”

Severus's living room was dark and a little cold. He soon lit the fire in the fireplace and chose a book when Hermione already had one in her hands. Severus sat in his lounge chair and she occupied the sofa. She most likely wouldn't have the head to read it, but that book she had taken from him was worth the try.

Hermione didn't get much further in her reading - and if Severus was honest, neither did he.

“I think I should go...” she was right. The night was approaching, and she couldn’t concentrate herself in reading. She was worried with spending the night so close to someone.

“Ok.” Severus stopped reading himself to see Hermione getting up.

“I will see you in the morning, ok?” Severus guaranteed. With a hand on her shoulder, he led her on.

“Good luck, Hermione.”

“You will be here when I get out?”

“There will be nowhere I would rather be.”

After seeing Hermione go through the bedroom door properly prepared for a werewolf and reinforce the security guards at the door, Severus was surprised when an owl knocked on his window.

**JUNE 20, 1998**

_Snape,_

_I know that Hermione is with you because Minerva told me. I insisted until I had answers and after not meeting you with Malfoy, you could be the second option to offer Wolfsbane._

_I would like to see you if it’s possible. I tried to write to her, but she doesn't open any letters from me and Ron's for weeks. I wanted to try to be a decent friend and I know that she is suffering. I couldn't do anything during the war because I was focused on my own emotions, but I want her to know that she doesn't have to worry about buying Wolfsbane's ingredients._

_I talked to Minerva and she said Remus had an unlimited supply. I talked with some people and got a contact at the Ministry that offered lifelong ingredients. If it is you who are really preparing the potions for her, I will pass on the contact of this man so that you can get in touch with him._

_Thank you,_

_Harry J. Potter._

Insolent!

Potter didn't make things better for himself. Severus wanted to try not to hate him for Lily honor, but it was difficult. At least, he managed to help Hermione in his way. Severus took a deep breath, finding himself in his chair. He knew that if his potion had worked, he wouldn't have to deal with a hallucinating werewolf. He felt horrible, remembering the accident when he was in fifth year. But what comforted him was that the person who was there was different.

The night was horrible. Not much better than he knew that a call from the Dark Lord would come to haunt him. He worried like hell about Hermione's health and well-being. He didn't tell her, but he had already confirmed with Minerva the position of teaching potions for the following year. He hated teaching, but if that was a guarantee of another year around her, he would. Severus hoped that Hermione would like to be his apprentice in Potions. This week they spent working was the best in Severus' life in a long time.

Severus took a deep breath when the clock struck 6:00. He was reluctant to the door to the room that was now supposed to house Hermione. He was not prepared to see what he saw, however.

Hermione was huddled in a corner, naked, with only the last night clothes covering her like a blanket would do. She was hugging her own legs, a trail of tears on her face was recent. She had a hard night with his help, he didn't even want to know what the nights were like when she didn't have it.

His stomach hurting, he got close enough to cast a spell and put her on clothes.

With all the care he didn't know she had, he held her in his arms to take her back to the real world. He would do everything to keep her safe. He realized. This is what you do when you have a student who likes you very much and who wants you to have an equally brilliant life and career.


End file.
